That infernal Prima Punta dilemma.

December 11th, 2011 | by: gadsby | Comments Off

PC or Mac, Jose or Pep, Marozsan or Cramer, Champions League or Scudetto, marmite or not marmite. All these great multiple choice just-tick-either-box-please questions that Western civilization has devised in a futile attempt to keep itself sane pale in comparison to the greatest dilemma of all; Alessandro Matri or Mario Balotelli. Prandelli, as is well known, has shown a shocking tendency to play only one Prima Punta in his 4-3-1-2 formation, usually alongside a second striker such as (the currently injured duo of) Antonio Cassano or Giuseppe Rossi. While I have no qualms whatsoever with this delightful and effective state of affairs, it does mean that we are only permitted to one of either Matri or Balotelli. So which one do we choose?

I say neither.

It is my opinion that in whatever upcoming friendlies we play, it would be in the interest of the nation if Cesare Prandelli were to start Inter’s Giampaolo Pazzini. While this suggestion may breed consternation in some circles, I am going to go right ahead and suggest it anyway, because it’s the correct theory. I know it must be correct because I thought it up myself.

An inclusion amongst Prandelli’s short term plans in a few pointless friendlies would be a massive boost to Pazzini’s confidence, an ego stricken by It’s own terrible run-in with former Inter coach and Leonard Cohen lookalike Giampiero Gasperini. A confident Pazzini can only be good for the general state of the league, and any boost to the league is a boost to the national team. In addition, Pazzini is, despite Inter’s mediocre start to the season, quickly recovering his excellent form of early 2011, scoring against Fiorentina this most recent saturday and being incredibly unlucky to miss a penalty the week before against Udinese.

It is becoming increasingly apparent as I write this that there will be some who cite the cases of Alessandro Matri and/or Mario Balotelli as better picks for the Prima Punta role. While it is true that Matri and Balotelli are not only much, much better, but would also fit in more aptly with Cesare Prandelli’s “meritocracy”, I Don’t Care, if I may quote the (quite dreadful) sketch off of the Mary Whitehouse Experience. Pazzini would, as outlined above, be an excellent starter for pointless friendlies, with Matri or Balotelli coming in for the games that mean something.

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In addition to Pazzini, another former Inter player (Laugh track starts playing) has been performing increasingly well to the immediateish south of San Siro, namely Mattia Destro, on loan at Siena, where he immediately scored 4 goals in 3 games, though admittedly he hasn’t actually scored since then. It is my most humble opinion that holds that, even though Destro is not, as we are all aware, the quality of Matri or Balotelli, I think an Azzurri call up would give speed to his passage to achieving that high stature, though, of course, it could have the effect it did on Antonio Candreva. And I don’t think any one of us wants to see that.